WTF?!

PAZ + Ke$ha = Na$ty

July 6, 2010

I fucking love Ke$ha.

For reals.

Pounding bass, catchy hooks, glitter, strategically placed narwhals… she has it all.

I was sitting around with Nick and Pat the other day in the studio thinking, “What’s the craziest song we could possibly cover for a video?”

The answer of course, was Bed of Razors by Children of Bodom.

But I’m not good enough, so we played Ke$ha.

See the new video for My First Kiss here.

WTF?!

I Played Beer Pong With Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner and All I Got Was This Stupid Hangover

March 28, 2010

“Re-rack. Triangle.”

It’s nine in the morning. I’m staring across a beer pong table at Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner.

It’s hot, I’m drunk.

And I’m losing miserably.

Where am I? How did I get here? And why are my pants soaked in warm Coors Light?

Read on.

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WTF?!

No Ed Hardy, No Affliction, No Problem

March 6, 2010

One word: awesome.

Two words: awesome nasty.

It’s like a dream come true. A fantasy even.

Apparently, some nightlife genius in New Orleans decided he’d had enough of Ed Hardy and Affliction shirts and decided to do something about it.

“I was literally watching Jersey Shore at 4am,” says Nick Thomas, Director of Programming for Club Republic, ”and I thought, nothing would make me happier if not a single person dressed like this was in my club.

“Then I thought, why can’t that be the rule?”

Why not indeed.

This publication would like to express its wholehearted endorsement of Club Republic’s vanguard policy in the hopes that other purveyors of night life entertainment (read: all clubs everywhere) might follow in the pioneering footsteps of the shrewd Mr. Thomas.

“But Nick!” some might say, “What’s next to slide down your slippery slope of shunned style? Pencil thin beards and super-douchebag v-necks?”

Yes please.

WTF?!

I Got Drunk And Acted Like An Idiot In Front of Seth Rogen. Now I Am In A Movie.

February 12, 2010

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“Here’s my ticket, how much?”

I’m outside the Standard in Hollywood, eager to vacate. I left a crappy party 20 minutes ago, and all I want is my car back.

I hand my ticket to a valet and look down to check my Blackberry.

“Uhhh, I don’t actually work here.”

I feel kind of silly. “Sorry man, my mistake.”

I walk away laughing a little. In all fairness, the guy WAS wearing a red satin vest and matching bowtie. Tip: If you don’t want to be mistaken for the valet, don’t dress like you’re playing one in a silent film.

I’m in the middle of my private chucklefest when I bump smack into another red-vested dude. Hmm… he’s wearing the same outfit as the other guy…

“Excuse me, can you get my car, or—

“Nah man – do I look like I work here?”

Am I retarded? I glance around and notice folks in red uniforms practically swarming the lobby.

It occurs to me I might be on a hidden camera show, until I realize Ashton Kutcher could care less about me than high school algebra.

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